Gifts from the Heart

It was a full moon three months ago on the 27th, Ulf’s ‘birthday’, when I was ‘told’ to take another route home.  I was quite puzzled until I took a turn and a huge moon  was right in front of me.  Ulf liked to talk about the moon and always noticed it’s changes,  so as I followed the moon all the way home, there was no doubt in my mind it was Ulf’s way of saying,   “Hi, Bev, I’m still around”.  So I became attentive of other coincidences that occurred.

One day a doe came into the space between the house and the fenced rose garden.  The house is elevated over a golf course with magnificent views of the valley and mountains.  Ulf loved the sense of peace this setting provided.  In a light handed manner,  I thought I’d practice communicating with Ulf.  Since he loved animals, maybe his energy could manifest through the deer.  So I became very still and focused on sending energy from my heart to the deer.  To my surprise, the doe froze in her tracks, looking in my direction, and stayed in that position for over thirty minutes. I imagined stroking her, much like Ulf stroked his ‘love’ bear. Since I was in the house and not totally visible, I even walked away to refill my tea.  When I returned, she was still there.  She eventually turned and quietly walked away.  Since then she has brought her two fawns to visit.  They all even sat down and curled up and took a rest.  They felt very peaceful and safe.  Yesterday morning,  I opened the blinds to see her sleeping, her head resting on her leg.  She probably was there for hours.  Whenever she shows up, I think of Ulf.

Several weeks ago I opened to the files in my Appleworks program.  When I did, I saw  one titled ”Best Wife”.  I hadn’t noticed it before so I opened it and discovered a lovely note that I included in a blog.  Ulf quit using his computer about 4 or 5 years ago, so my curiosity was aroused.  The next day I opened the program to see if there were any more and the program crashed!  I took the computer to the Apple Store but they couldn’t open it so they installed an upgrade.  When I arrived home and opened my computer, I discovered more lovely things Ulf had written on his old computer but never printed out. That transferred info came up with the upgrade. Someone once said,  ‘there are no accidents’!  This is one that was shared at Ulf’s memorial luncheon.  It’s a message for all of us.

BEVERLY

TAKE A LOOK AND FEEL THE ENERGY. GOD WILL BE WITH YOU                            ALL DAY AND LONGER IF ASKED. HE IS AVAILABLE AS LONG AS YOU KEEP AN OPEN HEART!!       Today is the day to see life with great GRATITUDE. Anytime you need support   I will be there for you.  I may need to train myself a bit but My INTENTION is to be “THERE” FOR YOU.

LOVE     YOUR HUSBAND                   ULF

Yesterday, I visited our community donations library.  The book,  On Life and Death, written by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross,  jumped out at me.  I have heard of her for years but never read her books.  She discusses all the questions I’ve been asking.   She has researched for years  over 20,000 incidences of people around the world dying or having ‘near death’ experiences.  She writes, “Every day people die all over the world. Yet in a society that is able to send a man to the moon and bring him back, we have never put any effort into the definition of human death.  Isn’t that peculiar?”  As I wrote earlier, these are exactly my sentiments.  She also states unequivocally, she has learned there is no ‘death’.  I also agree with that.  Like other books that I’m ‘guided’ to pick up since Ulf left,  each one brings just what I need to ‘hear’ in my present moment.

My friend Judy gave me a recorder for me to tape Ulf talking, then  download in the computer.  I tried using it a few times, but gave up on learning anything new and put it away, thinking I had probably erased whatever had been recorded.  Last week,  while sitting and reading, I was ‘told’ to get the recorder and plug it into the computer.  I wasn’t sure I even knew where it was but found it and plugged it in.  There was about 40 minutes of the most precious conversations with Ulf  I could ever hope to have!   It so touches my heart to hear his voice.  He is still teaching me to live in the present moment where   miracles show us we are all connected always.  A Course in Miracles says, “Communication, unambiguous and plain as day, remains unlimited for all eternity.”

On this 3rd month anniversary since Ulf’s ‘birthday’,  there was another full moon.  I went outside and saw a beautiful moon in a clear sky.  I took these photos and much to my surprise, received yet another gift from the heart!  It’s Ulf  saying,  “Hi”  again!

The full Moon

Ulf's moon---5 seconds later

Tags: A Course in Miracles, Being in the present moment, Dementia, Elizabeth Kubler-Ross, Love